4-years, 8-months, 26-days into Samantha’s abduction

Corona Del Mar, Diet Coke, phlegm

Tuesday, August 6, 2013: Another sleepless night Sam. You were on my mind as you are most of the time. Last night was different. I wrote you as I was doing my laundry but failed to mention something that happened to me earlier in the day yesterday. I guess I was still processing the event itself. I had a business lunch in Corona Del Mar. I arrived a few minutes early and as I was sitting down, I had to clear my throat. Up comes a big old nasty wad of phlegm. I did not want to be rude and spit it out in front of people in the restaurant, so I swallowed it. Not a good idea. A better move would have been to go outside or go to the bathroom to get rid of it. So, let this be a cautionary tale. Why? I am not sure if anyone has actually died from swallowing phlegm, I am sure it’s very rare. If it happens at all. Leave it to your Dad to have this go down my windpipe instead of my esophagus. It did not freak me out at first. I was calm and had my wits about me. As the seconds wore on and I was struggling to open my breathing tube. My first thought was that I could not believe I was choking on phlegm of all things. Really, after everything I have been through, this is how it ends for me? It felt like an eternity. I was really struggling for air. So much so, I could feel my head start to get faint. So, I started punching myself in the chest trying to help clear my airway. I could not breathe, I could not raise my voice to ask for help because that takes air. However I was pounding my chest hard enough and with all those people around I could not help but feel invisible. Nobody seemed to notice what was going on. It was surreal. Obviously things worked out for me in this moment.

Today I have been hit with this overabundance of energy. Perhaps I am subconsciously making every moment count because who knew something as little phlegm could potentially kill a human being. Perhaps it was the food poisoning flushing out all the bad toxins in my body from the other day. Or perhaps it’s the conscious effort to not drink so much Diet Coke. Whatever it is, I am grateful to be your Dad. I love you so much Sam. We continue to fight and make significant strides to make this right. You are my world Sam. If anything yesterday taught me that it can be taken away at a moment’s notice. We hear that a lot and it’s true. Be well Beautiful. I LOVE YOU!